Question Time with Caroline

Hello everyone in blogger land! I know it has been a while, but between Christmas and the new book coming out, I've been a bit swamped.

Every now and again I get an email from a fan and I wind up writing an incredibly long response and then I think to myself-- 'Self you should post this on your blog because it's just possible that somebody might find it interesting or relevant.' Let's hope that's true....

I'm going to abbreviate the question and then give you my response. If you have any questions, do let me know!!

The Question-- I am on 60,000 words at the moment and pretty close to finishing but am now unsure what happens next.  Do I just upload and see what happens?  It’s ok I am not expecting answers from you but I guess I am now in a place where I either move forward or just forget the whole (writing) thing and keep reading other people’s words.  I guess I am afraid someone will read my words and identify the same way I have and see the bits of me I have now learned to keep to myself.

The Answer-- First of all, congratulations on writing sixty thousand words!! That is amazing and you should be very proud of yourself. I suppose you could push the publish button and upload it, but my initial thought is that that might be hasty. You seem a bit conflicted as to what you would like to do and I think anyone writing a good book has to put themselves on the page and expect that readers will identify with them and think that they know them. I saw JR Ward at RT and people acted like she was a goddess. They love the peculiar darkness of her characters and it resonates with them. If that is the sort of book that you would like to write, then you are 'out there.'

There is no shame in writing a book for yourself and it's possible that over a bit of time you would become more comfortable with putting so much of yourself into words. My other concern is that perhaps you are rushing. Sixty thousand words is  on the short side for a novel.   If you have written a novella then perhaps what I am saying is irrelevant, but my guess is that there are areas of your book that would need to be fleshed out more to get you up to eighty thousand words which is standard novel size.

My advice is to put the book away for six weeks and then look at it. At that point the book is fairly unrecognizable and you can look at it objectively and decide what is working and what is not working. I would be very careful about putting your work out  into the world if you are the only person who has seen it. I've been in a lot of critique groups where I have been told that my writing sucks. I've also been told that my writing is good. You have to develop a thick skin so that when strangers take umbrage with your work-- which they will-- you can think 'go write your own fucking book if you don't like it' instead of wondering if they are correct.

From the way you talk about the book (which granted is in one sentence) I don't have the impression that you think you have written the Great American novel. It sounds like you proved something to yourself-- ie that you could do it-- and now you have to decide what you would like to do next. I'm a big believer in joining a writer's group, because they are the only people who will be interested in your writing. Before my book became successful, my friends and family had no interest in reading my writing and I did not want to subject them to it. Now they still don't have any interest but they keep thinking they should. lol.  Anyway, congratulations again and let me know what you decide to do :)

The Walking Stomach Flu

I have been sick as a dog for the last five days. My daughter brought home a stomach bug from preschool and it tore through the house like the Black Death. In the morning people were fine, by the afternoon it was too late.

The only good thing about being sick is that it means I get to watch a lot of TV. Usually my days are too busy and I can barely keep up with what I have. But during this illness, I burned through two seasons of The Walking Dead and I have no idea if that's a good show to watch or not when one is sick.

On one hand, I kept thinking it could be worse, there could be a zombie apocalypse. But on the other hand seeing so much gore and skulls being caved in wasn't good for my delicate constitution. The show really revels in the horror aspect of zombies and likes to get a close up everytime a pick axe goes into the brain.

When I was pregnant I watched charmed and I blame the estrogen for how much I enjoyed it. I found myself crying at the sisterly antics on more in one occasion and I'm pretty damn sure that show did not deserve any tears.

So what do you guys do when you're sick, anybody watching anything good? Apparently there is also a cold making its way through the school and undoubtedly into my house....

Love is Mortal excerpt- page 1

To celebrate the fact that November 15 is almost here I thought I'd post an excerpt from Love is Mortal. My plan is to add a bit more everyday until D day. Hope you like it!

Prologue

London, 1530

                                                                                                    

The air stank. The smell of unwashed flesh and burning candles. The smell of perfume and worn clothing. Marion loved a good party, but usually she just came for the food. She ran her finger down the Fey queen’s arm and watched as goose bumps rose on the woman’s flesh.

Pretty.

Marion loved women, but was anything more delicious than a woman dressed for a party? Maybe it was the dancing—that it made them blush and pushed all that warm blood close to the surface of their skin. Maybe it was the sweat—the slight sheen and taste of salt, the way her lips felt as they slid over flesh damp from a night of dancing.

Or maybe it was just because they were usually so happy that it made them beautiful to drink from.  They were human presents she got to unwrap. She licked her lips and saw her lover track the movement. Annika’s breath hitched, breasts straining against her low-necked dress. Marion was sure she could see a hint of nipple. The fashion did seem to include showing a rather large amount of breast, but the Fey queen was particularly daring.

Heaven forbid she leave something to the imagination. Perhaps it was because she was a fertility goddess at heart. She smiled. It could be downright difficult to get that woman to keep her clothes on. Marion felt very lucky that her goal of retrieving the Sard, a mythical object of Fey power, allowed her to mix work with pleasure.                               

“Annika,” Marion murmured and stepped closer, wanting to take a bite out of her right there. She was about to do it, but then she saw him.

Lucas. His arctic blue eyes fastened on her. His arms were crossed, and he looked irritated. As always. He was watching her, waiting for Marion to do what she was supposed to do.  I hate doing what I’m supposed to do. Marion sighed. “Business. It’s always business.”

It's a bird! It's a plane! No, it's a Jack Novella!

It's a Jack Novella! And the reasoning is this: When I first wrote LID the beginning was different. It was Jack and his parents. What his life was like before Val and then what happened with Marion and how we wound up with Val and her dad.

Anyway, that was the beginning of the book since day one up until a few weeks before the book came out. But LID was Val's book. So this beginning really didn't fit in. As much as I wanted it to. But every time someone read it, they really liked it and kept asking if it was ever going to come out. And it is! I'm excited.

It's going to be 99c on Amazon and should come out in the next few weeks depending upon how long my editor takes. Rereading it and tweaking it was odd. How much what happens in the next book relates to this scene written all that time ago. I'll keep you posted!

Why I won't read your book if you ask me to

So there I was looking at Loretta Chase's blog (I love, love, love her books and had the honor of meeting her at RT. There is a picture of me and her on my facebook page. I'm the one who was so overwhelmed I started to cry. Yes to the patheticness.) Anyway, so I was clicking through her links which led me to a post about what to do when asked to read someone's manuscript. I'm going to post Tess Gerritson and Orson Scott Card's responses to this question because...it's reached that point.

It's sort of surreal to be successful enough that I have to turn people away when they ask me to read their manuscript but I do. Whoda thunk. So please don't ask me.

This is from Tess Gerritsen's blog:

“HOW DARE YOU NOT READ MY MANUSCRIPT?”

Wednesday, Feb 15th, 2006 @ 09:36 pm

On Valentine’s day, I guest-blogged over at that great website MurderSheWrites.com, about my experience with an unpublished writer who’d just finished his first manuscript. My blog wasn’t actually about manuscript critiquing, but about how writers have to pay attention to their emotions when they write. My blog received a number of comments from readers. Among them was this one:

“How nice. I wonder if you remember when YOU had just finished writing your very first novel. Who helped you along on the journey? Or did all of your published (and not) friends avoid meeting with you, assuming you’d written nothing “marginally publishable”?

I’m sorry new novelists offend you, Tess. I’m glad you weren’t on my “must call” list when I finally completed the monumental task of finishing my first book. I may never have completed the second.”

My response to that? Thank GOD I’m not on your “must call list.” Because not only will you EXPECT me to be thrilled to read your work, you’ll also probably be truly pissed off if I tell you I don’t like it.

When I was a first-time novelist, with my first manuscript, did I expect a published friend to to spend eight hours (or more) reading it and critiquing it?

Absolutely not. I wrote my book and I landed my own agent. By myself. That’s how I thought writers were supposed to do it.

I think it’s perfectly legitimate for unpublished authors to ask published authors for agent recommendations or about trends in the marketplace. And these questions should be asked in a way that minimizes the published author’s time commitment. If she’s a good friend, then you can do it over coffee. If you barely know her, then by email. But I would never have dreamed of asking a busy novelist to read my entire manuscript.

And now that I’m a published novelist, I avoid reading them. Here’s why:

First, there’s the time factor. I get several requests a week from unpublished, unsold writers wondering if I’ll read their manuscripts. (I am NOT talking about novelists who’ve already landed a publisher and are seeking blurbs for book covers. Those are legitimate requests. I can’t honor most of them due to time constraints, but I do try.) If I were to say yes to every unpublished author’s request, I wouldn’t have time to write my own books. And truly, I’m astounded that people whom I don’t know, or hardly know, would come up to me and essentially ask, “Say, will you spend eight hours reading my incredible literary work?” Because that’s what it works out to. Eight hours of work.

And if you don’t see my point, think about this. What if someone you barely know says to you: “Hey, wouldn’t you love to come over and spend eight hours cleaning my house?”

You’d tell them thanks, but no thanks.

Which will then earn you the resentful comment: “But you OWE it to me because your house is so clean! Your clean house makes you OBLIGATED to help me!”

If the person asking me to clean their house is my mother or an elderly friend, you betcha I’ll go over and help clean the house.

Same with reading manuscripts. Mothers and close friends get special dispensation.

But when I hear unpublished authors whine that published authors are OBLIGATED to help them get published, that’s when my blood goes from simmer to boil.

Then, there’s the other reason I don’t read unsold manuscripts: It can lead to legal nightmares.

This is not just an excuse that we authors give to avoid reading unpubbed manuscripts — this is a real and serious concern for us. My literary agent has a bestselling client who, to be nice, once agreed to read an acquaintance’s unpublished manuscript. Then she got sued. By this very acquaintance. “You stole my story idea!” was the charge.

Needless to say, my literary agent now warns all her clients not to read unpublished manuscripts written by people they don’t know well.

I myself had a similar experience. I teach a writing course once a year down in Cape Cod, for doctors who want to become writers. Soon after my book BODY DOUBLE came out, I got a threatening email from one of the course attendees who said she was taking action to sue me for “stealing her idea.” The idea that I supposedly stole was about pregnant women getting murdered for their unborn babies.

I didn’t remember this woman. I never read her manuscript (it was read by someone else on the course faculty). And the idea I “stole” is hardly steal-able, as the murder of pregnant women for their babies is a crime that pops up in the news just about every year. But what if I HAD read this woman’s manuscript? What if (as often happens in literature) there WERE similarities in our plots? I could have ended up in court. I could have suffered through months of stress and attorney’s fees.

All because I read an unpublished manuscript.

Maybe I’m coming across as a hard ass about this. Yes, I know there are heart-warming stories out there, about New Author John Smith who got published because Bestselling Author Jane Doe read his manuscript, loved it, and sent it to her agent. But I can guarantee that John Smith didn’t just send it to Jane Doe out of the blue, and tell her that she was OBLIGATED to help him out. Maybe Jane was teaching a writing course, and he was her student. Maybe they were already friends. Maybe Jane judged a writers’ contest, and his story stood out. (While teaching writing courses, I myself have discovered terrific unsold manuscripts, and have always been happy to help shepherd them to a literary agent, because I LOVE it when a new author lands her first book sale.)

But approach an author you hardly know and ask her to read your unsold manuscript?

No.

Think of it as a reverse Nike ad.

Just Don’t Do It.

From Orson Scott Card: 

Question: Will you read my book/story/manuscript?

Answer:

Dear Fellow Writers:

Why I Will Not Read Your Manuscript.

If you're hoping I'll write you a glowing letter of recommendation:

You don't need it. What you need is a "wise reader," as I describe in my booksCharacter and Viewpoint and How to Write Science Fiction and Fantasy. What do you think a professional writer will do for you that your own "wise reader" can't do? Are you hoping I'll write a glowing letter of recommendation? Even if I did, it won't do any good. The editor will still make up his own mind. In fact, for all you know the editor might hate my fiction and think I'm an idiot, in which case my praise will be a negative. All that matters is the manuscript you wrote. Editors are hungry for good writing. If that's what you give them, they'll say so. If they don't recognize good writing when they see it, my letter won't help.

If you're hoping I'll give you wise advice that will make your manuscript publishable:

It's a waste of time. When I do read manuscripts in detail, critiquing them, generally the problems are serious enough that a complete rewrite is required. Few writers have the heart for it. My experience is that only one out of a hundred writers actually follows a single suggestion I make. And even if you try, there's no guarantee that you'll understand the suggestion, or that you'll be ready as a writer to do the thing I'm suggesting you do. Since I know from the start that in all likelihood you're not going to do a thing I say, why should I waste my time?

If you are a friend or acquaintance and/or you swear you'll do everything I say:

I'm not going to read it anyway. Even on those rare occasions when I agree to read a manuscript, it just goes on a pile of manuscripts that I really, really, really intend to read Real Soon Now. Only there has never yet been a morning when I woke up and thought, "I don't have a thing to do today! I think I'll read some of those manuscripts I've got piled up!" At the end of the day, I don't ever, ever say to my wife, "I'm done for the day and I don't need to go to bed for another hour. Where are those manuscripts so I can read one?" The result is that a year or two later, you feel bitter and unhappy about the fact that I never responded, and I feel guilty about not having read what you sent me, and so both of us are miserable, and the manuscript isn't read anyway -- so why not skip all the misery and just not send it to me in the first place?

I'm not proud of this -- but I've lived with me long enough to know this is what always happens, so I might as well be honest about it.

If you're thinking of offering me money to read your manuscript:

Give it to a good charity. I don't need your money. You don't have enough to tempt me. And even if you did, what I gave you in return would not be worth it.

If you're annoyed or angry that I won't help a struggling young writer:

My job is writing fiction. The only thing I owe to other writers is what I owe to other readers: To do the best I can with my own storytelling. When I teach writing, it's a hobby. I do it for love. Nobody has a right to demand that I teach them how to write or help them get published. So take a few deep breaths, return to the rational world, and then send your manuscript to agents and editors -- that is their job.

Is there ever a time when I'll read a manuscript?

Yes, if you're a former student of mine and you're in the room with me while I read. That's it. That's the only way I ever read manuscripts. If you have taken a class or workshop with me, then you have the lifetime right to consultation. But only on the first few dozen pages of an unfinished manuscript, and only in person, with you sitting there to receive my comments as I read.

Oh, yeah. There's one other exception. If your mother and my mother have the same yearbook picture, and we used to play Risk or Pit or Nurtz together as children. And even then I'm not very reliable.

If you're thinking to yourself that you're the exception, that if you just think of a clever enough way to ask me, I'll read your manuscript and it will make all the difference in your career:

It wouldn't, so I won't, so you can't, so you're not.

Regretfully yours,

Orson Scott Card

Maryse's review of LID. So excited!

Book Review – Love is Darkness by Caroline Hanson

by MARYSE on APRIL 8, 2012 · 4 COMMENTS

in URBAN FANTASY

Love is Darkness (A Valerie Dearborn Novel)I finished this one with a smile on my face. LOVED every minute of it. Never got bored, and never put it down. Nope. Start to finish I devoured it. AND!! I felt all of the emotion and turmoil and apprehension and… *ahem* other stuff   as the story progressed. The connections intensified, the course of events were realistic (well.. hehe. As realistic as a world with vampires can be…), and ummm.. you know. There’s plenty of steamy in here. This is NOT YA. BUT!! The “steamy scenes” teased!! BIG TIME. Quite detailed… and yet… left you wanting more. Another series were the reader is tantalized plenty, and things are not just “we’re-already-in-love” handed to you.

When the author first contacted (and sent me this novel), I immediately recognized the title as one that was so frequently recommended.

Sandra emailed me saying:

“It includes  the scary but way cool vampires, hunters and Valerie who really just wants to be normal.  Plus it was underpriced as an ebook.  Love it  ….couldn’t put it down and now waiting, waiting for the second novel to be released in December.    You have to read it .. Look forward to  hearing what you think.”

Desiree emailed me saying:

“Maryse,

You MUST read LOVE IS DARKNESS & LOVE IS PAIN by Caroline Hanson…alpha male x2 .. vampire. Can’t believe you do not have it on your site!! You will LOVE LOVE LOVE

Promise.”

and then the numerous Facebook and blog comment recommendations cinched it for me!

Kristina: Maryse I highly recommend A Valerie Dearborn Novel by Caroline Hanson (Love is Darkness & Love is Fear).. I read these 2 books in 1 day because they were THAT GOOD. Mega Alpha Vampire.. check.. average girl.. check.. average girl in love with a tortured badboy, CHECK, Mega Alpha Vamp interested in average girl & tortured boy getting pissed CHECK.. this is a different look @ the vamp world. The sex scenes are amazing & there is defintely HOLY SH*T moments.. I am desperately waiting for book 3 to come out. I have not been this excited since Fifty series & Effortless.. Especially for a paranormal romance. … if you want some hot vamps, hot humans, hot elves, etc.. then read these books asap!!

Yanira: ‎@Kristina thx for the recom, I had looked at these books, but now will read for sure!

Patricia: I know Yanira, Kristina has peaked my curiosity, .,….I think I need a vampire change of pace

Kristy: Valerie Dearborn series for sure! I flew through them so frantically my kids had to eat pb&j sandwiches for diner cause I refused to stop reading to cook

Maryse’s Book Blog: … you guys telling me about the Valerie Dearborn series – I’m DYING to read this now. Anything that has you all ignoring your real lives MUST be good!

Carrie: I finished Love is Darkness about 4 am earlier this week.  Once I started I couldn’t put it down!  … Considering the cliffhanger moment at the end of Darkness, if Fear leaves off the same way I’m going to be DYING for 3.

Dara: @Carrie…prepare yourself..it gets down right unfair…lol..but ohh you gotta read it!!

Tasha: I just found these books on Amazon and I LOVE THEM!! I am so mad the next one does not come out till May the cliffhanger was fantastic. I was mad at everyone but her in the end and excited to read what is going to happen next. I love when you can find a book that brings out all your emotion…that is the difference between a good author and a great author.

See? Over and over again, this many people just couldn’t be wrong. And you know what, after book #1, I wholeheartedly agree. Another fantastic read!! (I’ve been having a really good book week!!)

But here’s an admission. At first I found myself just a tad… meh about the subject matter. I thought to myself, ahhhh another kick-butt vampire hunter female. I don’t want them to hunt vampires!! I wanna them to cuddle vampires!! Yes, yes, I know. It usually always ends up that way anyway, so what was I worried about? I usually end up liking ‘em just fine (even loving them – Cat and Bones anyone?). My apprehension of the “kick-butt” heroine is that I find I tend to connect more when the heroine is more “human” than super-human, ya know? Yeahhhh, you know. I’ve said that before. Some like ‘em tough and already powerful, I tend to like ‘em quirky and perfectly imperfect.

And books like these that remind me of why I was such a vampire-addict when I first started reading again. It had everything I love in an urban fantasy. Valerie, a human female, (and okay, yes… she has a little something *special* to her). She is part “empath”, meaning… I dunno. In this one, nothing to humans, no distinguishable powers at all, but when she is around the paranormal… ahhh the powers kick in, on an emotional level. See!? Totally relatable to us human readers. For all we know, at least as per Caroline Hanson’s human/vampire world, we could be EMPATHS!! Uh huh!!! Weso could. I mean, who knows?! Maybe it’s ’cause we just haven’t met a vampire yet! Even if we didn’t have any recognizable powers in our past and amongst our human entourage… *nods emphatically*

No? ahhhh never mind. Tee hee!!! *blush*. Well… so? Still…. totally relatable now, when I put it that way, right?

Anyhoooo…. so she’s been in training to be a vampire hunter all of her life, as her mother was viciously murdered by one, and her father is on a path of vengeance. Along the way, a teenage boy (Jack) joined their cause of vengeance, as he too, lost his parents the same way. She crushed on him throughout her teenage life, and now that they’re adults, Jack is hotter then ever. But… still rebuffing her. Well. Sorta.

“This has always been here Val. We know it and we avoid it because it doesn’t change anything. All it will do is tear us apart.”

His motivation in life is focused on one thing. The extermination of vampires, and Valerie just doesn’t really have it in her, nor does she want to be a vampire hunter. See!! I LOVED her!! Totally relatable ’cause I don’t think I’d wanna be one either.

But there’s a vampire that has taken a keen interest in her.

And then he remembered the dead empath had a daughter.

Interesting.

Lucas is the oldest, most powerful, most gorgeous, most amazing, king of vampires. Except he is so ancient that his feelings, his empathy, his motivation is waning. Old vampires can’t feel. And to feel, or have a semblance of feeling, they must do outrageous things. Like murder, pillage… world domination. You know, stuff like that.

But when Lucas happens upon her bloodline, he secretly watches over her throughout her life. While Valerie does not know of her own powers and her effect on the paranormal world (especially vampires), she is a target. And on her first “stakeout” (hehe) with her father as a teenager, she is attacked, and Lucas secretly makes himself known to her, and teaches her a few things, himself.

“Kill him, Valerie. He attacked you.”

Huh. That’s a twist. She shook her head and dropped the stake, hands nerveless in fear. “No. I don’t want to.”

“Worse will come for you. You must learn to protect yourself. I cannot be here at all times. Do it now and with my protection. No harm shall come to you by my hand.

And Lucas begins to gain her trust (of course, only while her father and Jack are looking the other way).

Did she fear Lucas? Hell, yeah! But would he hurt her?

No.

Her mind and body knew it, the answer resonating through her like the vibrations of a bell.

And now that she is an adult, trying to live a “normal” life as a college student, trying to get passed her feeling of “Jack”, Lucas comes back in her life with a proposal. Now she has to decide who she can trust, and who’s telling the truth. The fate of humanity (and the paranormal world) is at stake, the balance is off, and with her assistance, his plans can possibly take fruition.

“There was a time when things were different. There was a balance in the world. There were Others. Not only vampires, but werewolves, Fey, witches, empaths – they were all real. All powerful. If one group became too bloodthirsty or powerful, the others could unite long enough to restore a balance.” A long moment passed.

“What happened?”

“Only vampires remain and I rule them all.”

Except that his opponents have something different in mind, and now her whole “normal” life has just taken a paranormal dive. The very thing she resisted all of her teenage life, is now front row and center, and she can’t ignore it anymore.

Oh and… she can’t ignore her extreme attraction to Lucas, either.

And yet, he’d been so compelling and fascinating, looked like some sort of medieval champion in Gucci, that if he was the face of evil, what the hell did good look like?

Not only had Lucas saved her life, he’d helped her – been patient with her, taken away her fear, gone on to star in some of her better fantasies.

And of course, there’s Jack. He may be human, but he is no less steamy, I can promise you that. Yep.

He was her childhood love. Even though she was grown up, he was still around and in her life. He’d show up, be all alpha male say something about how important she was to him and she just… couldn’t quite get over him.

He was the fantasy.

And I always hesitate when publicly comparing books to other books or series, but just to give you an idea, of the *feel* of it, at least for me, I want to say… and I will only say it in terms of the potential “love triangle” and not all of the other crazy stuff, but this one has that “Jean Claude/Richard/Anita” feel to it (pre-Anita’s ardor and multi-animal stuff that happened to her).

However Lucas is just… bigger, more masculine… seemingly much more powerful, and even sexier, to me. But If you’ve read Laurell K Hamilton’s Anita Blake series, you’ll know what I’m referring to. You know… when the books were great in the first half of the series? Of course Jack is not a were (at least not as far as I know), but it has that awesome delicious energy, and just… the *feel* of them, to me, is like that. Not that I’m complaining, because I’ve been dying to read another series in that vein. Heh. I said vein! No pun intended, but it turned out pretty good, didnt it?

Now… it’s not perfect. Some words missing here or there, and I found myself (at least in the beginning) wondering if I had just “missed” something, in the way some scenes changed, or some conversations occurred. It was rare, but I remember backtracking at a couple of times, checking to see if I had skipped a page. But this was only in the beginning, and didn’t confuse me enough to be lost. And there are a few questions that I still have, such as… do all humans know that vampire exist in this series? Or is it just those that have been “attacked” or those that are in blood-relationships with them? Because there are plenty of human/vampire interactions throughout, so… maybe I missed that part?

But overall, I was so thrilled with the story, that when I was done I just had that need to email the author and express my gratitude:

“Just to let you know I just finished “Love is Darkness” and loved it! Reminiscent of the vampire books I used to read and love when I first started in the genre. All that delicious tension! And scary, more traditional vampires. I’ve been needing something like this.

*sigh* so much fun!  And what an ending. I swear I’m crushing on Jack and Lucas equally.”

And all I can say now is wooooohooooo YAY because right after I’m done this review, I get to start book #2. And as they said up there, book #1 ends on a delicious little cliffhanger, so I can’t wait to get back to into it.

4.5 stars!

"Aloha, can I borrow your umbrella...and Dayquil?"

I'm back! I went on vacation with my family to Hawaii where it rained a lot. Every day in fact. And I got a migraine. Then I got a fever and finally I gave it to my kids, my parents and my husband. So everyone had a good time. Lol.

Actually, it was still a nice trip becuase it's Hawaii. My kids played on the beach, I got my Mudslides and french fries so all was right in my little world for the most part. Two days I woke up at 3 and stumbled down to the lobby in my bathrobe and flip-flops to write. Those people behind the desk didn't know WHAT to make of me!

I came home and I feel like the escape was good for me and my 'muse.' I had been having some trouble writing the third book, people have expectations and they are not shy of telling me about them and I have my own expectations and yet...it just wasn't happening. I didn't want to write anything. And this was my revelation-- writing is like dancing to your favorite music when no one is around. I dance differently, I go for it. I sing and I belt it out! Well, when I wrote LID it was the same way, I wrote that honey for me and if I thought it was a little risque with various chair scenes, etc. that was okay. It was my book.

But LID (and then LIF) took off and have done really well which is kind of like finding out my crazy dancing has been recorded and put on Youtube...but people liked it. So they wanted more dancing and even though people liked it I wasn't sure I wanted to dance in public. The books have gotten racier and I have some things I wanted to play around with in the next book which, while not necessarily steamier, they're still a bit 'out there' in my mind. I like the messed-up quality of my books and that's what I want to write and yet I didn't really want to 'own it' for some bizarre reason.

Anyway, I'm over it and I'm writing. I got the third book cut into 19 index cards that are posted next to my desk. The whole plot. I'm stoked. And then I finished a very rough draft. So now I have to dive in and see if there is anything worthwhile in there or if I just have to write it all over again.